Tea with the Queen

Lessons from My Year of Yes

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My Year of Yes. The concept was simple: say yes to everything, and see where life takes you. And let me tell you, it led me to some surprising places.

My adventure began with a major life decision when I was a little younger; I decided to move from Perth to Melbourne. Was it scary? Absolutely. Did I know anyone or have a job waiting for me? Not a chance. But sometimes, you just need a new adventure. Western Australia, with its perpetual blue skies, started to feel a bit too predictable, and I craved more. 

In my early twenties, this urge for change manifested into a commitment to saying yes. Yes to parties, yes to moving in with new people, yes to opportunities and yes to living life in a city where I knew not a soul. This was my year of yes. I threw myself into every invitation and opportunity that came my way, and the lessons I learnt were invaluable.

The Power of Yes

One of the biggest takeaways was understanding the sheer power that saying yes can wield. By opening yourselves up to new experiences, you also open the door to meeting incredible people and having adventures you’d never imagine. On one occasion, a simple compliment about my shoes at the cinema turned into a date with a dashing Frenchman. True, he wasn’t the love of my life, but moments like these enriched my Melbourne experience and taught me to embrace spontaneity. 

Finding the Balance

Of course, there’s a caveat. Saying yes to everything can be exhausting. I learnt firsthand that it’s important to find a balance and recognise when to slow down. Nevertheless, this year of yes cemented my love for Melbourne and taught me the value of creating connections, both professionally and personally. 

Yes in Business

Saying yes isn’t just about personal growth; it’s equally impactful in business. Especially in those critical first few years, when opportunities feel scarce, saying yes can lead to unique collaborations and a client base you might otherwise miss. It’s about putting yourself out there, taking calculated risks, and accepting that sometimes you’ll face rejection. But those rejections shape you, teaching you who the right clients are. Remember, it’s better to try and fail than to never try at all.

Building Relationships

One of the loveliest side effects of my yes year was the friendships I forged. When I moved to Melbourne, I quickly befriended my neighbours, a kind South African Indian couple, Vic and Divinia. Divinia, noticing my, let’s say, less-than-stellar culinary skills, graciously offered to bring me dinners, often with a glass of milk to temper the heat of her spicy meals. That simple “yes” led to a friendship that has lasted over decades, just as it would in a business setting. Imagine saying yes to a client today, still working with them ten years later. It’s all about those mutually beneficial relationships.

The Challenge: Just Say Yes

So, I challenge you — are you saying no too often? Could there be moments where a yes might lead to unexpected growth? Even substituting a flat no with a “yes, and…” or “yes, however…” can open the doors to new possibilities. Rejection might sting, but every yes brings you one step closer to finding your niche, be it in friendships, clients or life.

The year of yes taught me that the world is full of opportunities waiting to happen. It’s about choosing a mindset of growth and adventure — leaping into the unknown and learning to soar along the way. 

So, why not take that leap of faith too? Say yes to a brighter, more unexpected future. It might just work wonders for you, as it did for me.

Emma McQueen:

For a copy of Emma’s book, ‘Go-getter: Raise your mojo, shift your mindset and thrive’ – https://emmamcqueen.com.au/want-more/emmas-book/

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[00:00:19] Emma: [00:00:00] This was my year of yes.
Oh my goodness. This what's an exciting one. I, if you have been listening and playing along, you would know that we have been running this series of more personal stories of mine. And, one of the things, if you have listened to any of the podcast episodes, and you might wanna go back because it may not make sense, but one of the things that I did when I was a little younger.
He's decided to move to Melbourne from Perth. I went to Melbourne one day. I went on a skiing trip and I thought this would be a fun town to move to. Did I know anyone? No. Did I have a job? No. Did I have a house? No. but I thought, you know what? I needed a new adventure. I'm originally from [00:01:00] Western Australia.
Now if you live in Western Australia, you would know it's boringly beautiful. My dad every single day will say to me, oh, it's beautiful blue skies. And I think, is there anything else? Is there anything else? And as I'm mid 20 something, I was like, you know what? There has to be other things. So I decided I'm gonna move to Melbourne.
I. I had a very good job in Western Australia, so I organized some interviews. I went over to Melbourne. I interviewed with some, organizations. Got a job, came back, packed my stuff up and buggered off. Now, partly, I won't lie, this was probably to escape, my family situation. Not gonna lie. my mom was.
Still messing around and had bipolar and all the things, and I was just like so done after years and years of trying to manage that situation. But I'm like, I'll move to Melbourne and then I don't need to do anything else. Poor Serena was heartbroken because we only have each other. So I moved to Melbourne and my dad said to me, the airport, bless his cotton socks.
See you soon. I'm like, not on your Nelly mate. [00:02:00] I am out. Anyway. I moved to Melbourne and at the same time I made this commitment to the year of yes because I don't know about you, but if you've ever moved somewhere that you don't know anyone, the only way. To get out is to say yes to things. So for the next year, I said yes to everything.
I said yes to movies. I said yes to standing in line on my own. I said yes to gonna parties. I said yes to moving in with random people. I said yes to deals and job opportunities and, trips around the countryside and all the things I said, yes, In fact, there was one. Specific moment in time.
I was wearing the most beautiful pair of shoes. I was in the, movie theater in pra and this gorgeous French man walked past and he noticed my shoes. Who does that? They were amazing shoes. But anyway, who does that? And he said to me, [00:03:00] great shoes. I'm like, thank you. I really like these shoes. Anyway.
And of course that turned into a date which won't surprise you if you've listened to any of the other podcast, uh, series that we've got going on right now. and it was lovely French accent, all the things, and my friends really loved him no I didn't marry him. That's not the love of my life.
But anyway. I said yes. I said yes. I was standing in a movie line on my own and I was just chatting to the couple in front of me and they're like, oh, after this we're going to da, dah, dah, dah, dah. Would you wanna come? I'm like, sure, sure, sure. I wanna come. It was the year of Yes, and it taught me two things.
One You can exhaust yourself with yes.
Which maybe I did a little bit of, but two, I would never have had the experiences that I have had and it would never have cemented my, living in Melbourne so much. it has cemented my living in Melbourne and my affinity for Melbourne because I said yes to so many things In business, we get told to be a bit picky and [00:04:00] choosy.
We get told to say no to these things. Say yes to these things. We just need to say yes, especially if you're in your first year or two. It's just like gotta be the year of yes. You've gotta say yes to opportunities. You don't know where they're gonna go. You've gotta say yes to collaborations. You've gotta say yes to to work.
You've gotta say yes to clients. That's just how it is. And I think one of the things that. The year of Yes. Taught me is that it's pretty easy to get rejected. You say Yes, someone else says no. Oh, and you move on. Right? But it really built that muscle for me of just putting myself out there. Being bold and the right people come along and they stick like forever friends.
And that's the same with clients. If you are saying yes to work and yes to clients, yeah, you'll make some mistakes. Yeah. You go, I shouldn't have taken that client on. Yes, maybe they weren't aligned, but. What you will learn [00:05:00] is who you wanna hang out with from a business perspective, who the right clients are, who the wrong clients are.
But you'd never know that if you didn't say yes in the first place. So we really need to stop doing the whole. These are the clients and only these clients I wanna work with. Yes to niching. I can hear it right now. I can hear someone saying, Vanessa, you always talk about niching. Yeah, I do because I'm nine years into my journey.
But if you are one or two years into your journey, you may not know yet. you may only have one program. I've evolved so much over the time, and you know what? Sneaky secret. I still work with blokes. I mean, they have to wear pink, let's be honest. But I don't advertise that I work with blokes.
If bloke comes to me and says, can you coach me? Yes, yes, I can. But that it doesn't necessarily mean that we take the focus away from the niche market. Saying yes means that we stretch ourself. It's uncomfortable, it's growth, it's all the [00:06:00] things. And you think, I don't really wanna put myself in that situation, but by saying yes, by being positive, by having a growth mindset, by making sure that you don't miss any opportunities means a chance to build revenue.
You all know how much I love building revenue because what does revenue do? It gives us choice. It gives us freedom. It's not about being greedy. Talking about money should be absolutely normal, but talking about money when you don't have any sucks talking about business when you don't have any sucks.
And so my. challenge to you today is, are you saying no? Just a bit too often? Is there a way that you could say yes a little more or instead of just a straight no? What about coming in with curiosity and going, yes and or Yes, and here's how I think we could do it, or [00:07:00] Yes, however, la la, la, la. Versus just saying a flat out, no.
The year of Yes. Taught me so much. The year of Yes. Taught me about rejection. The year of Yes. Taught me about how much fun you can have with total strangers. The year of Yes. Taught me that you can make lifelong friends. when I moved to Melbourne, I moved to an apartment in Perran. I. And I will never forget this opposite.
My apartment was a South African Indian couple, uh, Vic and Divinia, they are beautiful. And they had just arrived and I was working a lot and, divs was pregnant with their first baby. I. Now for those of you that don't know, I don't cook, can't cook, won't cook, whatever, whatever at that stage, none of that anyway, and as I got to know this beautiful couple divs and Vic, I would come home from.
work about seven o'clock and I would have Vegemite toast because again, can't, won't, don't cook, right? Anyway, div's picked up on this one day and she [00:08:00] said to me, Hey, Emma, I do cooking every day for Vic and I, how about I just make you something and bring it over from time to time? I'm like, that would be amazing, but don't make it too hot Ds, 'cause I don't have those kind of taste buds.
From that moment every night I had a plate of food delivered to my door. With a glass of milk because she knew I couldn't handle the heat. And we played that game for a good year. And I babysat their little boy sun, who is now oh, 2021. And that was all from me saying yes. And so the possibilities are endless.
Did I see that coming? No. Did I contribute anything to that? Maybe a beanbag. I said to divs, do you need a beanbag? 'cause you know, that's all I had. and they also thought it was quite funny that I would regale them with tails of my Yes. Year. So I suppose that kind of worked out. I'm still friends with them.
However, many years later, the year of Yes. Pays dividends. [00:09:00] Now imagine if that was business and you said yes, and 10 years later you are still working with them. Isn't that freaking amazing? You both would've evolved, but you both would have just developed this amazing, beautiful relationship that is mutually beneficial.
So please, please, please, please say yes. Say yes to you, yes to work and yes to possibilities. That's it for today, ladies.