A few days ago, my friend Alex dropped a line into conversation that made me gawk.
“Commit to the committed.”
It came after I told him about someone who’d reached out asking for a free ticket to the next BD Sprint.
Now, if you know me at all, you know my first instinct is generosity. If I can help, I will. That’s just how I’m wired. But this time, I didn’t answer straight away. At the beginning of the year, I gave myself permission to slow my decisions down, to sleep on things and give myself time to think rather than react. Best gift I’ve given myself.
And the longer I sat with it, the more I remembered something I’ve seen play out over and over again in business.
When something is given for free, it’s rarely treasured. There’s no skin in the game. No stretch. No story of “I did this.”
So instead of a straight gift, I went back with a different offer. I said I’d happily gift them a ticket if they could share it and bring along two other people. Fair’s fair.
It wasn’t about the tickets.
If they could sell two spots into the BD Sprint, they could sell. Full stop.
It would be a mini masterclass in action. They’d build confidence, prove something to themselves, and walk in already knowing they’re capable. A proper win-win-win.
The next day, when I told Alex what I’d done, he smiled and said, “That’s committing to the committed.”
And I just sat there for a second. Because he’d put language around something I’ve been doing instinctively for years but had never quite articulated so cleanly.
If they’re committed, they’ll find two people. They’ll earn their spot. They’ll show up differently.
If they’re not, no harm done.
It felt aligned. Generous, but with boundaries. Supportive, but not rescuing.
Why this matters more than you think
This principle goes well beyond a free ticket. It’s about how we run our businesses, how we choose our clients, and how we protect our own energy so we can keep doing good work.
I’ve seen what happens when both sides commit. When I ran the BD Sprint with my Thriving Women community, 50 women signed up. I insisted on a clear plan: one hour a day of actual business development. Picking up the phone, building relationships, doing the work. Then showing up to share wins, learnings, and stuff-ups, because that’s where we all learn.
My commitment back to them? Three plans to choose from, a morning sales tip, an end-of-day wrap, and accountability. I also provided gold stars, because people are wildly competitive. Gold stars is where the magic happened.
The results over 10 days:
- 1,500 new LinkedIn connections.
- 322 phone calls made and answered.
- 97 meetings booked.
- 26 proposals sent.
- 103 pieces of new business secured.
The numbers speak for themselves. But the real magic was the confidence. Momentum built. Community strengthened. And everyone had fun. Sales can be fun. Who would’ve thought?
That only happened because both sides committed. I committed to showing up every single day, and they committed to doing the work.
So how did my free ticket story end?
She didn’t bring anyone.
And you know what? That’s okay. It told me everything I needed to know. No drama, no judgement, no hard feelings. It just confirmed that the commitment wasn’t there. And because I’d set that small test, I didn’t waste my energy, and neither did she. Everyone moved on.
Imagine if I’d just handed over that free ticket straight away, no questions asked. She would have had a spot. She probably wouldn’t have shown up fully. And I would have given that energy to someone who wasn’t ready for it, instead of someone who was.
Three things to take away from this
- Audit your energy. Look at where you’re spending your time this week. Are you pouring into people who are showing up and meeting you halfway? Or are you chasing people who keep cancelling, keep saying “maybe”, keep asking for more without putting in? Be honest. Then redirect your energy towards the people who are committed. That’s where your results live.
- Set the bar, then match it. Set clear expectations up front. Here’s what I need from you, and here’s what you’ll get from me. When both sides know the deal, that’s when things start to move. Clarity creates the connection, and the connection creates the opportunity. If someone can’t meet the bar? That’s information, not failure. For either of you.
- Test commitment before you invest. Before you give away your time, your expertise, or your energy for free, create a small commitment test. It doesn’t have to be money. It could be “bring two people along.” It could be “send me three questions before our call.” It could be “complete this one task before we meet.” If they do it, you know they’re in. If they don’t, you’ve saved yourself a whole lot of energy.
Where in your business are you rescuing instead of requiring commitment?
And what might shift if you started committing to the committed?
I will always be in your corner. When it’s too hard, when it’s going well, it doesn’t matter. But I need you in the arena with me. That’s the deal.